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Picture this…
Every day is a weekend where you can do whatever you want to do and you’re not dependent on the other (be it a person, place, event, situation, that damn alarm clock, action, money, or a thing) — in other words, personal freedom.
Hot dang Happy New Year.
Two things happen when you read that –
- you know that you have the power to make things happen because you understand that happiness often comes from within.
- or, you’d think: “This mentality can actually make some people (me for example) unmotivated and lazy. It just makes you step back into your comfort zone. 🤷🏻♀️ You should have a goal and success should be your only option.” Personally, you would feel rather guilty for creating space for yourself.
The second one, my dear, is very common for most of us. It’s a perfect example of addiction to hustling and struggling. At least when we’re busy, we can pat ourselves on the back and say, “Hey, look I’m working hard. Looks like the day’s over at five o’clock!”
As a reward, we celebrated the beautiful phenomenon known as summer vacation.
There’s a common belief that a large majority of our lives must be hard work just so we can have a couple of sweet breaths of play and freedom. That’s why the right path in life is slaving away at a 9-5 until you can retire old and exhausted. Once you reach retirement, only then you can have your freedom.
I’m not lying. One of my copywriting clients — I just finished writing a biography book for him — told me that he worked his a** off because he wanted to start living at the age of 60. Say what!?
To save you from a whole multitude of regret and heartache, let me share a secret I found after I did what he did and fell into depression years ago.
You were born with freedom; no one gives it to you. You don’t have to wait for anything to be happy. Whether it’s Monday or Saturday, you have freedom.
But…
We grew up waiting for the last bell to ring, and the school deludes you into believing that you must earn your freedom.
Play and work don’t have to be exclusive. It’s up to you to craft your lifestyle around both. You don’t need to be bound by a 9-5 or anything.
When I say every day is a weekend above, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t take action. But inspired actions are coming from a place of inner power and clear reason, not because you tell yourself that “you have to, or should do, something.” If you notice, it immediately brings up resistance and steals your ability to be happy.
If you want to be happy, there are certain stubborn behaviors that we need to let go so they don’t get in the way of our happiness.
READY TO LET GO OF THINGS THAT DON’T SERVE YOU ANYMORE?
Check out my free guided audio to get started on how to release emotions painlessly on the spot!
Now I’m about to give you….
88 Things To Let Go of To Be Happy.
Things To Let Go of To Be Happy
My late dad used to tease me, “Things that no longer serve you can’t be sold anyway. Why don’t you get rid of those things?”
Yes, I used to hold on to things that I should have let go of. Me and other 7.8 billion people living on Earth.
The funny thing is, having limiting thoughts and feelings can become a bad habit even though it’s no longer serves us. They are our greatest source of suffering.
We tend to hold on to things — yes, suffering is so familiar, isn’t it? — because the mind is not very good at processing reality and much more likely to pay attention to what’s wrong than what’s right — we call it the negativity bias.
Moral of the story: Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating.
Negative thinking happens to all of us, but if we recognize it and allow that to pass through awareness, we are taking a big step toward a happier life.
Remember, no need to stop negative thoughts. Telling yourself, “I have to stop thinking about this,” or, “I have to change my thinking!” only makes you think about it more.
What you resist, persist.
Instead, welcome your thoughts. When you are in a negative cycle, acknowledge it.
If you think, “I’m worrying about my financial situation,” allow yourself to welcome the sounds in your head without engaging with it. If you don’t hold on to it, it will be calmer, and then stop by itself.
Ready to experience more joy and fulfillment than ever before? Here we go.
88 Things To Let Go of To Be Happy
1. Listening to negative thoughts and thinking those are truth.
2. Self-defeating self-talk.
3. Sleepless nights and worrying about what has happened in the past or what might happen in the future.
4. Expecting the worst of everything.
5. Allowing your emotions to control your actions.
6. The need to be in control of everything
7. Stubbornness and your need to always be right.
8. Holding on to problems to find closure.
9. Wanting to fit in.
10. Finding your identity in what you do.
11. Living for the weekend to lead your life.
12. Trying to do everything yourself.
13. The idea of asking for help makes you look weak.
14. Your limiting beliefs.
15. Anxiety.
16. Meeting everyone else’s needs while neglecting your own.
17. Putting so much pressure on yourself.
18. The fear of the unknown.
19. Never letting yourself to take a break with ease, stop, and just be.
20. Playing the victim.
21. Your suffering.
22. Keeping your feelings bottled up inside.
23. Wanting to change yourself and disapproving of yourself.
24. A negative body image.
25. Your attachments to a person, things, events, or places.
26. People pleasing tendency.
27. Trying to make everyone happy.
28. The fear of not being enough for someone.
29. The need to impress others.
30. Worrying what others think of you.
31. Carrying about other people’s opinion.
32. Obsessing about the things you can’t change.
33. Wanting everyone to like you.
34. Any possessions that don’t bring you joy.
35. Clutter in your home.
36. Perfectionism.
37. Your judgments — when you’re constantly judging others, you’re stuck in fear of being judged too.
38. The identification with the body-mind.
39. Your insecurities.
40. Unrealistic expectations.
41. Blaming others for your problems.
42. Your avoidance behaviour.
43. Comparing yourself to other people.
44. The constant need to complain about those many, many, many things.
45. Your clinging tendency — yes, it pushes people away.
46. Your denial.
47. Procrastinating on important things.
48. Your excuses.
49. Self-doubt.
50. Fear of failure.
51. Greed — wanting without giving.
52. Guilt over past events.
53. Overspending.
54. Your meaninglessness feelings.
55. Your pride.
56. Your baggage — things that happened in the past and the feelings they generate and hold you back.
57. Your low standards.
58. The resistance of taking care of the body and to get the body moving.
59. Overindulging on unhealthy habits.
60. Holding grudges.
61. Jealousy.
62. Anger and wanting to get even.
63. Laziness.
64. Thinking you’re not ready.
65. The fear of missing out.
66. Waiting for the right time.
67. Over scheduling your life.
68. The thinking habit that something is missing from your life.
69. Your lies and the tendency to break promises.
70. Unhealthy and destructive relationships.
71. The idea that there’s only one person out there for you.
72. The habit of critizing yourself and others.
73. The fear of success.
74. Resistance.
75. Living your life to other people’s expectations.
76. Ignoring your inner voice and inner calling.
77. A job you hate.
78. Trying to rush through things.
79. Your obsession to your phone.
80. Your dependancy on social media.
81. Refusing to change.
82. Pretending pain and suffering don’t exist — Comfort food. Retail therapy. Alcohol and drugs. You name it.
83. Your comfort zone.
84. The past.
85. The idea of a “perfect life”.
86. Your quest for happiness — there’s no such things as achieving happiness. If you stop and notice, you find there’s feeling happy right here, right now.
87. Your delay to be happy.
88. Looking away from the truth of what you are.
Let Go to Have A Purposeful, Happy, Harmonious Life
Letting go is a skill that every person needs to have to create a fulfilling life.
When it comes to our best self, it’s natural to set goals and have more. But becoming a better you is about removing, not adding.
Too often, we try to move forward without letting go, plunging on that quest to our best or true self without first assessing whether our first step forward should actually a step back.
I’m speaking of those toxic habits and behaviors that prevent us from becoming who we were created to be.
Consider coaching
We’re certainly happier when we learn how to let go of our obstacles. When you’re faced with a problem, think about what got you through something similar in the past. If you really examine your past, you move on after you let go.
If you feel like you’re hitting a brick wall, consider speaking with a healing coach on a weekly basis. You don’t need to have a diagnosed mental health condition or an overwhelming crisis to seek coaching.
Coaches are trained to help people improve their life. Plus, there’s no obligation to continue once you start.
Even just a few sessions can help you add some new goodies to your emotional toolbox.
Worried about the cost? Here’s how to afford coaching on any budget.
Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it.
And if you have trouble to see that, I can help you with that.
Click here to book your complimentary session now>>>
I’m looking forward to supporting you to continue to let go of the things that do not serve you and to embrace things coming to you that are perfect for you in the moment. Everyone wins when you stay in this course.
In the wonderful words of Jason Mraz, “You don’t need a vacation when there’s nothing to escape from.”
Now you.
What are the things you need to let go of to be happy, right here, right now?
Let me know in the comment below.
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hari says
amazing post! thanks for sharing.
so much truth in this post!
Ade Aprilia says
You’re most welcome. Thank you for reading, Hari! Yes, sometimes we overlook these things and they’re running in the background to only hold us back to live our best lives. I’m glad you found your way here!
Riley says
This is so inspiring!! Love your blog🤩
Ade Aprilia says
Thank you for your kind words! I’m glad you enjoy the blog! ❤️
Thomas says
Nice post. I’ve been working on letting go of a few things.
1. Detachment as a defense mechanism from being hurt by attachment.
2. Maintaining friendships based on potential instead of reality.
3.The inability to forgive without closure.
Those are just a few. Long journey but worth it.
Ade Aprilia says
Thank you for sharing your journey, Thomas! I agree, letting go is worth it, it creates more space for us to live our best lives. Well done, you, for achieving so much!
Melisa says
I’m in love with this post! I actually laughed out loud when I read “beautiful phenomenon known as summer vacation”. It’s so true! This is a fantastic post, thank you so much for sharing!
Ade Aprilia says
Ahaha, right? We tend to delay our happiness for nothing at all, and it doesn’t make any sense at all because we live now, not in the future! Thank you for reading and thank you for being you! ❤️